A Harvard study followed 268 undergraduates from the classes of 1938-1940 for 75 years, regularly collecting data on various aspects of their lives. The findings were reported in this recent book by Harvard psychiatrist George Vaillant.
Here are five lessons from the study pertaining to a happy and meaningful life. First, the most important ingredient for meaning and happiness is loving relationships. Even individuals with successful careers and good physical health were not fulfilled without loving relationships. Second, money and power are small parts of a fulfilling life; they correlate poorly with happiness. Those proudest of their achievements are those most content in their work, not the ones who make the most money. Third, we can become happier in life as we proceed through it, despite how we started our lives. Fourth, connection with others and work is essential for joy; and this seems to be increasingly true as one ages. Finally, coping well with challenges makes you happier. The key is to replace narcissism with mature coping mechanisms like concern for others and productive work.
Noteworthy is that these findings overlap almost perfectly with what Victor Frankl discovered about the meaningful life. Frankl says we find meaning through 1) personal relationships, 2) productive work, and 3) by nobly enduring suffering. The only difference is that Frankl doesn’t talk specifically about money, although no doubt he would agree that it is of secondary concern. Also noteworthy is how the findings of Vaillant and Frankl agree with modern happiness research. Here are just a few of the excellent books whose social science research supports these basic findings.
The How of Happiness: A New Approach to Getting the Life You Want
Flourish: A Visionary New Understanding of Happiness and Well-being
Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience
A thought:
We only get more proficient at something by continuing to do it; learning from errors; thinking and reasoning out better ways to do and carrying through thoughts with action. All of this requires interest, preference and motivation. Grads of prestigious schools were motivated, a priori. They, or their resource-rich backers, turned motive into action—interest and preference ( and skull sweat) made it all hang together as reality. Success is a goal, of itself.